Why David McCormick Is Not a Suitable Candidate for US Senator of Pennsylvania (and also a Total Twat)

by Craig Hartranft on February 19, 2022

in Humor & Satire, Op-Ed

David McCormick: “Yeah, it’s true. Donald Trump has no balls. He’s also a liar, too.

Pennsylvania has a US Senator seat up for grabs, and there’s more than 30 people from three different political parties who want the job. Most will not make it through the primary in May. However, there are a few that our getting a lot of television time from commercials.

David McCormick is one of them.

He has quite the pedigree including being a hedge fund manager, military veteran, and formerly Under Secretary of the Treasury for International Affairs in the George W. Bush administration. He also eats puppies for breakfast. So why is he unsuitable to be PA’s next senator?

  1. He’s a Trump Republican which automatically disqualifies him from the office. Trump was the instigator of an internal rebellion against the United States who should either be in jail or hanged for treason as should all those who participated in the January 2021 insurrection. You would think Republicans would their lesson from supporting Trump. But no.
  2. He’s ugly and dresses funny. McCormick wears ladies lingerie under suits like Mormon’s who wear that creepy religious underwear.
  3. He’s a fucking superrich millionaire which means he is not like us when it comes to understanding the needs of the average working lower class and middle-class American. He can buy elective office with his own money. Who does that? Only those who want more wealth, power, and influence. He isn’t like us: the 99% of Americans. Don’t fall for the bullshit in his commercial where he says his friends will keep him “grounded” in reality. They’re probably rich as fuck too.
  4. He divorced his wife and mother of his four kids and married some younger woman who is also richer than fuck. If he pulls the “family card” in his campaign, you know he’s not forthright and a loser. (And, I’m just spit balling here, he was probably having an affair with the gal before he got divorced. If so, that just makes him an unfaithful, unloving, selfish degenerate who thinks with his cock.)
  5. He eats puppies for breakfast and kittens for dinner.

BTW: I’m a long-time registered Republican, but I’m an American first who believes in and upholds democracy and the Constitution of the United States. Anybody who supports Trump Republicanism or ideology, by definition, does not support either.